Sometimes, especially when you are young, you have limited experience of your own, in many different areas. But you are not restricted to learning through your own trial and error; you also learn from other people's mistakes, and from this, you determine not to make those same errors in your own life. Not only can you learn from other people's flaws, but you can also gain wisdom through observing the best qualities that are found in others. When you notice something admirable about another person, you file that information away in hopes of putting it to good use later on; you aspire to cultivate those same excellent traits in yourself. You can learn a lot through witnessing other people's trials and triumphs. And so, in honor of Valentine's Day, I'd like to share some of what I have learned about love:
1. Never fight with your spouse in front of other people. Save those verbal disagreements for another time, when you can have a civil talk with each other in private. And please, whatever you do, don't trade insults with each other in public on social media platforms like Facebook. If you want to ruin your relationship, then an easy way to do it is by telling the world that everything is far from rosy between the two of you.
2. The little things matter. But too often, people ignore what they shouldn't ignore, and call attention to what doesn't need to be noticed. If your spouse does something special for you, don't take it for granted; show your appreciation. But if your loved one makes a little mistake or has an embarrassing moment, cover for him/her by pretending like nothing happened. When it comes to little things, ignore mistakes, but notice the small favors your spouse does for you. And say thank you or share a special smile.
3. Choose love over money. This does not only apply to your choice of whom to marry; it also applies to your financial decisions later on in your marriage. Sometimes a couple's savings are intact, but their marriage is in tatters. In this case, it might be a good idea to use a little of that money to take a special trip together or find another way to fall back in love with each other, temporarily putting work on the back burner.
Men, if your wife wants to buy something, is it really worth putting her down as she does so, even if times are tough?
Women, if your husband is worried about the bills, put off making that new purchase. You don't need it; after all, love is more important than money.
In a nutshell, try to avoid straining your relationship, especially when it comes to financial decisions. Some people should relax and stop worrying about finances, and others should stop spending money they don't have.
4. The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. If your relationship is losing its spark, don't start looking for love and fulfillment elsewhere. Instead, ask yourself what you can do to help restore your marriage. Don't sit idly by as your marriage grows stale. And don't wallow in self-pity. It's easy to lose sight of what you have and to focus instead on what you don't have. But in times of hardship, you have a choice: you can either rise to the occasion and be there for your loved one... or you can be selfish. Resist putting yourself first; instead, show unconditional love to your spouse. Be grateful for what you have and remember that your love is worth fighting for.